Note: This guest post is adapted from Harvey McKinnon’s book, The 11 Questions Every Donor Asks and the Answers All Donors Crave. Next month, I’m excited to be joining Harvey for a webinar on this topic… and you’re invited, too.

“Me” is everyone’s favorite subject.

It’s no surprise that a donor’s first question (whether spoken or not) is … Why me?

It’s a loaded question. By asking it, your donor is trying to get situated in the world, or at least in your world.

Going through the donor’s mind – simultaneously – are these related concerns: How do you see me? Do I approve of the way you see me? Do you really know me? Do you care about me? Am I important to you for reasons other than my money?

When “Why me?” is an obstacle

Carol had all these questions.

After a distinguished career in public health, she retired and devoted herself to organizations serving seniors. Noted author and consultant Mal Warwick, who at the time was establishing a community foundation focused on young people, approached Carol and asked if she’d become a Founder. His goal: a gift of $5,000.

“Why me?” she asked. “You know I never give more than $1,000 at a time. And my interest is seniors, not youth. Why should I do this?”

This is a common dilemma fundraisers face. Virtually all people predisposed to philanthropy are already donors. It can be tough to break into their “circle of concern.” Yet it’s still possible, as you’ll see in Mal’s case.

Using questions to respond to questions

“Knowing she was fully capable of giving $5,000, and that she viewed herself as a community leader, I felt I could persuade her to join the Founders group,” says Mal. “The challenge was to relate our mission to her fondest interests.

“So I asked whether she saw any contradiction in helping young people rather than seniors.”

Mal is nothing if not astute.

“The question caught her off guard,” he continues. “She started thinking out loud about intergenerational programs: young people helping seniors with household chores while the seniors, in turn, mentor the young. She recalled the youth who had participated a program she herself was running.

“As she spoke at length about this intergenerational concept – novel at the time – she talked herself into giving $5,000. The amount wasn’t the problem. All she needed was an excuse to give.”

Look for the linkage

Mal knew exactly what he was doing. In a kind, respectful way, he allowed Carol to discover that she also cared about their community’s youth. Like most people, she wanted to help.

By posing that one perfect question, Mal had solved her problem of priorities – and Carol became a Founder.

As this example shows, the art of fundraising is about helping donors understand how your cause meshes with their personal interests. By entrusting you with their money, how they can achieve something they want: namely, improving the lives of others.

Other answers to “Why me?”

The “Why me?” question can be answered in a variety of ways.

• Through your past gifts, you’ve shown that you care.
• You’ve met ____ (a person the cause has helped) and your gift can help others like her.
• You’re respected. Your support will inspire others.
• You know how big the need is. Your gift will provide solutions.

There are many other answers, of course. By deepening your understanding of the donor, you’ll identify the best ones.

Donors have questions! 

While “Why me?” might be the first question, it certainly isn’t the last. Among the other topics donors are thinking about:

• Why are YOU asking me? What’s your role?
• How do I feel about you? Do I respect you?
• How much do you want? How will my gift make a difference?
• Why now? What’s the urgency?

The list gets longer, but you get the point. By anticipating these questions – and preparing thoughtful questions of your own – you can have meaningful conversations with your supporters. Meaningful conversations lead to deeper relationships, bigger gifts, and ongoing support.

Asking (and answering) better questions

On Wednesday, December 2, join Harvey and Andy for a new webinar, Raising More Money by Asking (and Answering) Better Questions. We’ll help you anticipate and prepare for your donor’s deepest, most probing questions.

And we’ll share a dozen question you can ask after your donor says yes. Here’s our guarantee: At least a few of these “after questions” will totally surprise you.

Hope you can join us!