Note: This post is adapted from Train Your Board (and Everyone Else) to Raise Money by Andrea Kihlstedt and Andy Robinson.

Most of what we call fundraising takes place before or after you receive the donation: prospecting, cultivation, recognition, donor engagement, and so on. You can do all those things supremely well and still miss an essential step: sooner or later, you have to ask for the money.

This exercise is designed to increase everyone’s comfort by providing specific language, then giving you and your colleagues a chance to practice until you find the words that work best for you.

Setting up the exercise

Time required. 20 minutes.

Audience. Anyone who plans to conduct meetings with donors.

Setting. A quiet room large enough for people to pair up, talk, and hear each other.

Materials. Photocopy the sample “ask language” below and the sample gift charts.

Ask people to pair up, preferably with someone they don’t know too well. Explain that the purpose of this exercise is to try out different ways of asking for a contribution. You’ll find several options below you can share by handing out copies of this exercise. Encourage them to start with these scripts, as needed, and then personalize the language until they are comfortable.

Please note that some scripts include a dollar amount while others leave the amount to the donor. Encourage your colleagues to try some of each. Use this exercise to increase everyone’s comfort by asking for larger gifts. Given the time required to schedule and conduct donor meetings, we strongly recommend asks of at least $500 or $40 per month.

Different ways to ask for the gift

Try as many of these scripts as you like until you find your own language.

• “Is there an amount you’d feel comfortable pledging today?”

• “As you know, I have three goals for this meeting. I wanted to give you an update on our work, and we’ve done that. I wanted to learn more about your interests and concerns, and I thank you for sharing that with me. And, as you know, this is a fundraising visit – I’m here to ask for your financial support. We were hoping you would consider a gift of $____. What do you say?”

• “As a board member, this organization is one of my top three charitable commitments. I believe you feel as strongly about this work as I do, so I hope you’ll consider making it one of your top three.”

• “We are looking for a group of people like you who understand the importance of our work and are willing to give as much as they can. Would you be able to pledge $____?”

• “We’re setting our budget for the coming year, and it will help us if we know how much we can expect from our supporters. Would you consider $____? It would mean a great deal to us all.”

• [Handing donor the gift chart] “Here’s our fundraising plan, showing a range of giving options. When we fill in the chart, we reach our goal. Please take a look and choose the amount that’s right for you.”

• “For this campaign, our family gave the biggest contribution we’ve ever given—and it felt good. What amount would feel good to you?”

• “I thought about how much I would feel comfortable giving, and then I decided to stretch myself a little. We’re hoping for a ‘stretch gift’ from you. Would you consider a gift of $___?”

• [Handing donor the gift chart] “To be honest, I have no idea how much to ask you for.  I don’t want to insult you by asking for too much or too little. Please take a look at the chart and give me some guidance. How much should I ask for?”

Facilitating the exercise

Once everyone is in pairs, the partners go back and forth, trying out different phases and sentences and giving each other feedback on what works and how to improve the language.

When the exercise is complete, debrief it by asking the full group some combination of these questions:

• What were your favorite phrases? Why?

• When you were playing the prospect – the one being asked for the gift – what language or approach worked best for you? Why?

• Is it important to get the language right? Why or why not?

Training tip

If you’ve already created a gift chart for your own campaign, use that. It will help your solicitors better understand the structure of your fundraising effort.