Note: This guest post is from Sheree Allison. Thanks, Sheree!

In our small community, you’ll find Executive Director Happy Hour in the back corner of Olivier’s Wine Bar. It’s anything but happy, as nonprofit CEOs swap bizarre tales of boardroom misbehavior. 

These stories effect nearly every nonprofit. Mariette, one of the EDs, often jokes that her next job might be stand-up comedy. 

And with that … fill your glass and pass the cheese! Who wants to go first?

Missing in action

Barbara raises her hand. “Let me tell you about Rita,” says. “Over three years, she’s been to a total of nine meetings. She attends if her appointments don’t conflict, and she won’t do virtual meetings. 

“I said to the chair, Rita has no interest in our organization. Look at her attendance. The chair shook his head: Rita’s father is a major donor. She’s entitled to a seat on the board.” 

Barbara continues, “Our last meeting was Tuesday and Rita didn’t show up. I suggested putting a plaque on the wall: Rita MIA. This didn’t go over well.” She closes her story with a gulp of Merlot.

Board chair goes rogue

Rachel chimes in.  “Let me tell you what Sylvia did last week. Since she became board chair, I call her The Slasher. She tackles everything head-on and slashes whatever gets in her way. 

“She took quite the solo swipe last week. Without board discussion – never mind direction – Sylvia moved our $2 million investment fund to another financial advisor. No authority, no permission, no consultation. She went rogue. So far, nothing’s been done about it.” 

Rachel rolls her eyes and takes a bite of cheddar cheese.

Hiring and firing

Debbie picks up her second glass of wine: “Why isn’t Maureen here?” 

Barbara pipes up. “Didn’t you hear? She was fired last week. One of her board members pushed for his niece to be hired. When Maureen told him she would handle hiring, the board terminated her two days later.”

Who speaks the truth? Who hears the truth? 

As you can see, Executive Director Happy Hour is a tell-it-like-it-is gathering. 

Here’s the problem: most EDs are more than willing to raise a glass and speak their truth – to each other. They’re less willing to tell it like it is when and where it matters: in the boardroom and to the board chair. 

For some struggling nonprofits, rogue board members can pose the greatest threat.

What’s your tolerance for conflict?

How do you feel about confrontation and conflict? 

Many people are conflict averse. But without productive conflict – encouraging different viewpoints, digging deeper by asking difficult questions, seeking data and evidence before making decisions – the real work doesn’t get done. Minus generative, difficult conversations, board meetings tend to reinforce the status quo. The desire for consensus can override individual voices.

When that’s the situation – and a new board member speaks to the issues, asks tough questions, and cares enough to debate – they can be marginalized. Why? Because they’re not being “nice.” 

Good rogue, bad rogue

Effective boards embrace peer conflict. There’s a myth that everyone needs to row in the same direction, which isn’t true. Without conflict, you get complacency.

The concept of “going rogue” cuts both ways. As noted in the stories that began this piece, rogue leadership can disempower the rest of the board and make it harder for staff to do their work. These leaders can minimize or ignore new voices, tamp down on productive conflict, and tolerate unethical board behavior. That’s what I would call toxic rogue.

On the other hand, going rogue can be a way to challenge complacency, ask hard questions, and push the organization to better meet its mission. That’s a healthy rogue board member.

Executive directors: Find your voice, use your power

What does it mean to be an executive director who no longer tolerates unworkable board behavior?

Start with simple yet powerful commitment: Speak your truth with compassion. How you honor that commitment is reflected in how you show up.

Lead by example. If you want board members to be punctual, always be on time. If you want them to be prepared, ensure that you are well-prepared. Set the standard and never compromise on that standard.

Address issues promptly. When you notice unworkable behavior, address it immediately if appropriate, or schedule a time to discuss it with the relevant board member. Never let issues slide by.

Handle with humanity. Lead with compassion. As the saying goes, “Speak to people like they are God and make space for their garbage.” Marginalizing or bad-mouthing board members never works. Remember: they are inherently good human beings who sometimes need a reminder of their truer, better selves. As a leader, that’s one aspect of your job.

These changes won’t happen overnight. Your task is to develop, with intention, the best version of your leadership self.

Find your voice. Use your power. Rather than complaining, embrace your responsibility to create change.